Still holding my breath

9:17 AM
I have absolutely no idea how it is I'm even managing to write at all; my hands are shaking so much. It all built up to this, that's what I wrote. I feel as though I'd been holding my breath for 63 agonizing days--and I've only let it out slightly. I know his name. I say it repeatedly out loud, maybe try it in a few accents. It sounds like a strong name, maybe belonging to a distinguished British family who have a "manner" instead of a house. I picture myself tearing across like, a vast English garden in the countryside, calling out "ahden my dear, come home". Oh god, I'm so silly and giddy with excitement. I want to know everything about him. I want us to love each other so badly. I may have already lost my voice because of all the screaming I was doing in the dining room when they read out the names.
Arden. arden. arden. Shermeen and Arden.